A punch in the gut to the families of terror victims
We as a country are caught in a vise.

I just got a message from Chaya, one of the bereaved women we work with in the Koby Mandell Foundation. The Koby Mandell Foundation was created in honor of our son Koby and his friend Yosef Ish Ran who were murdered by terrorists 24 years ago near our home in Tekoa, Israel. Since then, we have worked with hundreds of bereaved families from terror and other tragedies.
Chaya just received a devastating phone call notifying her that the Palestinian killer of Erez Rond, her son, is about to get out of prison and be set free. She says that she felt like somebody had punched her in the gut, as if she was receiving the news of her son’s murder again — as if her son was being killed again.
She wrote on Facebook that she is asking Erez for forgiveness that his killer is being released. Erez was 18 years old and if you look at his photograph, you can see that he was a happy young man, bursting with life, two weeks before he graduated from high school, a leader in Bnei Akiva.
Multiply the message that Chaya received by thousands.
Terror victims know that the danger of releasing Palestinian killers is not theoretical but real.
The hostages need to be released, and most of us are not naïve about the price. We know that we cannot bear for our people to be hostages in Gaza, but we also know that the price we have to pay is unbearable. The price is what created Oct. 7 because of the previous release of Sinwar in the Gilad Shalit deal, and the price is one that other Israelis will have to pay in the future because terror will continue. The price is another Israeli family knowing that their world has been destroyed. The price is the fact that, in terms of this hostage deal, we are at the mercy of Hamas.
I’m glad that my son’s murderers were not found. I would be terrified that I, too, would receive a phone call telling me they were letting out Koby and Yosef’s killers. I, too, would ask Koby’s forgiveness as a murderer of children was set free. But what does that say about justice in this country? How can we pretend to offer justice to the families of terror victims, when that justice is temporary?
We as a country are caught in a vise.
There’s no right answer because either way is filled with pain. We all feel the terrible pressure.
In addition, Hamas is trying to ramp up the pressure, to condemn us to psychological warfare this week. Waiting for the list. Waiting for another three hostages to be released. Waiting for the next hostages.
This nation is like the baby in the story of the two mothers who go to Solomon claiming the same baby. It is the true mother who is willing to give up her child to the other mother rather than hurt him.
Avraham in the Bible was ready to sacrifice his son Isaac but God, in the end, told him that he didn’t have to. We are tired of paying the price, we are tired of the sacrifice, the deaths of hundreds of soldiers, the deaths on Oct. 7. We are tired of being called on to sacrifice so much, to bear the injustice of releasing the killers of our children.
God, release the hostages but without this bitter price. Otherwise, the families whose children’s killers are released become emotional hostages. I know that’s better than being physical hostages, but don’t mistake or discount the price that the families of terror victims will have to pay. PJC
Sherri Mandell is co-director of the Koby Mandell Foundation which runs programs for bereaved families in Israel. She is the author of the book “The Road to Resilience: From Chaos to Celebration.” Her book, “The Blessing of a Broken Heart,” won a National Jewish Book Award in 2004. She can be reached at sherri@kobymandell.org. This article first appeared on The Times of Israel.
comments